What Happens When a Man Truly Sees All Sides of a Woman

A truly loving relationship begins when a man sees and values every side of a woman—her strength, vulnerability, femininity, and joy. I rarely meet men who are capable of truly seeing their wives in their full complexity. Seeing them as they really are. As we women may see one another. As friends and colleagues often do. I believe very few men take the time to fully recognize and appreciate the totality of the woman beside them. And yet a woman is never made of just one personality. She is composed of many layers, many versions of herself. And each of them requires a different kind of presence, attention, and understanding. Your wife is an extraordinary woman, I once said to a dear acquaintance. She is incredibly strong. A decisive, powerful, deeply characteristic personality. I admire the inner force with which she has achieved everything remarkable in her life. Her determination is extraordinary.Her focus. Her discipline. And the way she coordinates your family life carries that same courage and unwavering strength. He smiled.

She is all of that, he said. But she is not only that. There is also the softer woman living within her. The one I see when I wake beside her in the morning. The woman whose presence makes me think that everything in my life is exactly as it should be. That my life has meaning. That I am lucky simply because I get to wake up smiling beside her. That softer woman is another face of my wife. And I think perhaps only I am allowed to see her that way. I see how deeply she longs for tenderness. For love. For her femininity to be noticed and appreciated. For her vulnerability to be recognized without being exploited. And I do everything I can to make sure she feels like the beautiful, irresistible woman she truly is. I want her to know that for me, no one else exists. Women must be loved deeply,” he continued. They should be treated like goddesses. If a man does not understand this—if he cannot feel it instinctively—the entire balance of family life eventually collapses. Everything begins to fall apart. And I want my wife to be happy. Radiant. Then he pointed toward her. Look at her now. She is like a little girl. And I adore this side of her too. She is laughing so freely, almost playing, her joy bubbling out of her like a child’s. It amazes me that one woman can contain so many different characters. I honestly do not understand how it is possible. Compared to women, we men are astonishingly simple creatures. He laughed softly. All I can do is admire her. And remain endlessly fascinated by every version of who she is. Perhaps this is one of the deepest forms of love: Not loving only the version of a woman that feels easy to understand. But learning to recognize, cherish, and protect every face she carries within her. Agatha Seymour